How To Live Like a Rockstar When You are Not One...
Traveling the Canadian Prairies. July 29, 2019. Big Beaver, Saskatchewan, Canada. I woke up at 06:45 but there was no way I could get up. Exhaustion had succeeded any chance of alertness. I fell back to sleep and woke up again at 09:00. Not Larry and I had a little slap and tickle to kick off the morning. At 11:00 we were packed up and ready to roar. I called dad who was at my brother’s house doing some farm...
A Strange Twist of Dates Feb 3 Life is just so freaking strange sometimes. It is just a strange twist of dates… Right now in my life, I am at the farm in Big Beaver, and I am trying to get all of my journals moved from paper books that they are and typed out on my laptop. I have 17 journals that I have written every single day for the past 10 years, and it takes me about four...
The Cuban Scooter Heist Jan 15 Bean and I are a lot. That is becoming clear… Bean says that we are the guys in the books that everyone else is reading about here on their vacation. That is probably a very accurate assessment. The day really began when we were trying to track down a car to rent at Starfish, our resort. We walked into a tiny air conditioned shack in the resort parking lot where a man was leaning...
The Postcard Barrel 18 September An amazingly cool thing happened today. Well, it all goes back a couple of months. Today ties to a day in late June when I was on Isla Floreana in the Galapagos. I wrote this from that time…. “The post office ‘barrel’ has existed since the 1800’s and it is where ships used to leave mail they wanted delivered. If you stopped at the beach where Bahia Post Office was located on your way...
Waskatenau – Finding a Job But Wanting a Statue. September 17. I awoke this morning to a man calling me to give me job. That is bittersweet. I need to job as I need to make money and have enough to get out of the Canadian Freezer before the cold swallows up my will to go on, but jobs just do not really suit me…. They say that a man should never do what he is good at for free,...
September 16. A Fantastically Strange Message. I received a message in my Big Beaver Diaries inbox today that threw me for a mental loop. My mother is one of 8 brothers and sisters from a mix-matched family of parents who divorced in the ultra conservative 1950’s. I often wonder how society viewed divorcees at that time… My grandparents were undoubtedly seen as despicable sinners by that society. Both of those grandparents remarried and had more children. That made it so...
Sylvan Lake to Waskatenau – Time Warp. 15 September. I was awake at 2:45am. My alarm was set for 4:45am. I wanted those two hours of a coma sleep, but my body would not agree to such a plan. I think it is because I have been partying until 4am nearly every day since about December and my body was truly confused about how I put it to rest at 10pm. I think it thought the rest was just a...
Sylvan Lake: Domesticity, Child Caring and Bearing. September 14. I got this message from my friend Jan today. This entertained me very much; “Anyway I thought you might get a kick out of this… on my Mac my favourites board contains 12 websites. I don’t know if you are familiar with the favourites board but as soon as I click on the internet my homepage consists of my 12 favourite pages in smaller view. But you can still see what’s...
Penhold, Bentley, and Sylvan Lake. September 13. Penhold parade took place today. I spent most of the parade racing Kellen for candy that was thrown from cars. The parade was more about politics than anything else. It disappointed me. Where are the cool cars? Where are the floats? Here is the Liberal Party representative. Here is the NDP party representative. Here is the PC party representative. Here is the town secretary… Good thing there was candy to buy the children’s...
Penhold: Motivation for Income Necessitation. September 12. It is tough to make myself to find a job right now because I still have money in the bank. I am not broke. If I was broke, I would have had a job already last week. But, trying to find a job when I have a bank account that could probably fund my existence until Christmas if I was in Central America makes it tough for me to go and get...
Penhold: Pepperoni Hamburgers in a Haunted House. September 11. After a late start because of a little lady’s illness last night, Travis and I left Penhold and went to Red Deer to buy diapers and beer. That is quite a combination. I tried carrying the diapers and felt that it was bad luck so I had Travis carry them instead. Some things just do not look right on me. Perhaps one day I will have to buy diapers. Maybe...
Sundre to Penhold: A Cool Trifecta. September 10. Maybe I am not supposed to be a writer and maybe my path in life is to bring old friends together…people who have not seen each other in many years. Today was a trifecta of awesome. Priscilla cooked bacon and hash-brown cuisine for breakfast and we started out day. A snowy day. This is an absurd amount of snow outside. It is like January out there and it is just out of...
Sundre: What the Cowgirls Do. September 9. You can really dig through your past when you spend time with someone you grew up with that you have really seen in about 25 years. It takes a little while for conversations and characters to flow naturally as you show each other who you are today. Then you just feel so proud of what the other has become with their life. Priscilla and I spent the morning looking at pictures of...
Regina to Sundre: A Gal I Grew Up With. September 8. Coincidences are cool. A couple of days ago when Bean, Fiona, her parents and I were in Montana’s Cookhouse, I ran into a friend from home named Lynette. She told me she had been visiting our friend Priscilla Tames who was down. I grew up with Priscilla. When they sold their farm my brother bought it. We were like family as kids. I called Priscilla and jumped in her...
September 7. Life is quieter in Regina than I ever remember it being. I guess that is due to aging process? In any case it has given me time to read, a luxury I do not seem to have enough time to enjoy. So, I am back to ‘Sex at Dawn – The Prehistoric Origins of Modern Sexuality.’ This is Part II of fascinating things on sexuality through the ages. Sex at Dawn – The Prehistoric Origins of Modern Sexuality...
Regina: ♫All My Rowdy Friends Have Settled Down…♫ September 6. Fiona’s parents came to town today. So, a girl from Scotland who I met in New Orleans who came to Big Beaver, who fell in love with my friend and moved to Regina, had her parents come to visit her. Bean and I had met them in Glasgow in January, so it was interesting to see them in Regina. From what I have seen, Fiona and her parents seem...
Regina – Beer Dog. September 5 Beaner told me that stench is added to propane because it is actually odourless. That is my interesting fact of the day. I wonder how it was agreed on what the international stench added would smell like. Perhaps someone create a smell and everyone said, “This scent furthermore will represent propane and will never represent anything else. Hereto, all propane processed on earth will have this specific smell added to its gastric compound.” That...
Sept 4 It was a lazy one today. Most of it was spent most of it reading. This blog entry is a little different as I have taken some very interesting parts out a book called, ‘Sex at Dawn – The Prehistoric Origins of Modern Sexuality.’ These are just some fascinating things that I read that should be shared! Sex at Dawn – The Prehistoric Origins of Modern Sexuality Christopher Ryan, PhD, and Cacilda Jethá, MD. Published by ‘free-eBooks.net’ ...
Regina: Checking the Oil. September 3. Today was time for a full STI check. I call it checking the oil. I have no concerns. It is just time to have the oil checked. I showed up at the Regina Qu’Appelle Health Clinic as a ‘walk-in.’ Time to look under the hood. I was the last guy to get in for checking the oil. A pretty girl about my age took me into her office. I have always thought about how...
Regina: Potential Broken Gl-asses. September 2. Dan told me that one time he was in Bismark, North Dakota. He was filling up with gas and realized that he could save $0.04 a gallon if he was part of the armed forces. So, when he went in to pay, he showed the person behind the counter his ‘Safeway’ club card. He told them that it was his card because he is part of the armed forces in Canada. That saved him...
Regina: ♫Road Tripping with Two of My Favorite Allies…♫ September 1. A welder friend of Dan’s told him that metal in the 1980’s was way better than it is today. The metal that is made today is not very good. That is interesting because he could be talking about music. Dan, Bean, Fiona and I went road tripping to Parry to Bean’s farm to drop off a truck load of things he has collected that he calls ‘treasures’ and...
Big Beaver to Regina: Labour Day Party. August 31. 5:20am is too early for any human to have to be awake. But I had to tie up a few loose ends with packing before dad drove me to meet Travis and Kellen at the Harptree grid just south of Bengough. I said goodbye to pa and then Travis and I had an awesome visit all the way to Regina. It is very nice to be around him. In Bengough at...
Big Beaver: Clown Costume Aftermath. August 30. Showing up for a party at night in clothing fit for a clown is fun. Waking up the next day hung over and realizing that you will have to put the clown costume clothes on again to get home is a lousy feeling. It is awful to feel terrible and have to battle though the day in such apparel. It limits what you are willing to do. There was no way I...
Coronach: Old Boys Club. August 29. It was quite a day as a farmer. I walked over the hills through the pasture with a .22 rifle in search of gophers to hunt, but there are none around. I walked for a mile and a half through the pasture to the field where my brother and my father are working and I never shot a bullet. I collected a cow-skull though, so the walk was not futile. My brother Matt...
Big Beaver: Harvest Time. August 28. It is harvest time and I am a farmer again. Not a great one, but a farmer once again…for a couple of days. Chad made breakfast this morning and I headed back to the farm for harvest time in Big Beaver. The main combine broke down last night but my very handy brother had everything fixed today and we finally got out into the field by 4pm. We are combining peas. Dad is running...
Bengough: Motocross Awesome-Sauce. August 27. Becoming a farm-kid again is a transition that seems natural, but in a way it is a slow process. I am out of practice and out of farm-kid shape. I have the calluses of a writer. In the evening I went to see my friend Chad in Bengough. I got to his house and he had two motocross bikes in his garage. I couldn’t resist. I spent about 15 years on bikes like those, but...
Big Beaver – Something in the Air. Aug 26. Something crazy is going on… My friend Fiona is from Scotland and I met her in New Orleans, Louisiana. She ended up in Regina, Saskatchewan, because when we were partying in New Orleans in June of last year, I invited her and her friend to our family centennial farm party in Big Beaver, Saskatchewan. Unbelievably, her and her friend came. At our farm centennial, Fiona met my friend Beaner, lust overtook...
Big Beaver: Money, Whores and a Fake Passport. August 25. I wrote an email to my friend Rhett a couple of days ago asking him to send me his phone number. He sent it to me and when I looked at it the last four digits ‘9969’ looked unfamiliar to me. I have had his phone number a couple of times before and I had nearly remembered what it looked like. Somehow 9969 confused me. I sent him a text...
Big Beaver: Rain Rain Rain and My Entertaining Father. August 24. The rain will not let up. There has been three inches of consistent dreary rain… Mike woke me up, brought me a glass of water, fed me pancakes and Pizza Pops and then drove me home through the slop. It was great to spend time with him. I got home and visited with dad and Pat. I like to be around them. I like to tease Pat with...
Coronach: Universal Thoughts with Mike. August 23. It is raining like crazy here. There is far too much rain. The earth here is saturated. It has been two days of rain, at a lousy time. Had the sun been shining my family would be in the fields harvesting. I wish that was happening as I would like to be a part of that while I am home. I spend the day with dad and then Michael came to pick...
Download Chapter 1 of Traveling Through North Korea
February 7, 2016 Today was a special day where I went to spend an hour with a silverback gorilla family in the mountains of Rwanda. It was…
May 4, 2014 Breakfast was at 8:30am, and I was the last to arrive. I was still feeling effects of the chicha, the local corn-moonshine we had…
January 10, 2017 Anyone ever heard of a band called Electric Eel Shock? There is a reason why you haven’t. The reason why you haven’t heard of…
July 26, 2014 I wish I could say that we were inside of a pristine shiny and sterile cocaine lab that I had pictured in my mind…
August 3, 2008 Bangkok, Thailand -Sex Show [su_dropcap]I[/su_dropcap]t was early August and my German girlfriend and I had just left Australia on a cheap flight to squeaky…
June 3, 2016 Convincing a 20 year old to get out of bed at 10:30 is no easy feat… It turns out that playing Slayer really loud…
March 15, 2014 We were up early to meet a group of three other gringos at Central station at 10am. We were early. We were tired. We…
January 30, 2015 My father was hanging out with me in the basement, and then he began getting his band equipment together to haul upstairs to load…
March 18, 2013 Want the recipe for a fascinating day? This one serves three: Step One – Get Ingredients and Heat up the Oven It started when…
May 1, 2012 I was up at 7:00am, showered, packed and caught a bus from my hotel to Hyun Jin’s place where she fed me breakfast. She…