Lake Bunyonyi to Fort Portal: Tired Man. Feb 11. I got up early, had breakfast and checked out of Wilfred’s Place. It is a beautiful property, but I need to get going and see more of the country. Plus, my body aches from labor that it is unaccustomed to. To get from Lake Bunyonyi to Fort Portal, I caught a motorcycle for about 45 minutes to take me into Kabale for 10,000 shillings. I am not sure how a man...
Lake Bunyonyi: Blistered Softie. [su_note note_color=”#b0b1b6″ text_color=”#030303″ radius=”1″]There are bats that come to Wilfred’s Place at night/early morning. They come in around 03:00 and stay until about 05:00, having conversations with each other. The trees around the eco-farm are like a conference room. It is like there is a meeting taking place, and the bats make these strange noises in communication for two hours. Then they leave again as a group and once again the surroundings are silent. It is...
Lake Bunyonyi: Hard Work is Hard Work. Feb 9 I woke up in a wonderful cottage clinging to the side of a hill with a terrace overlooking a beautiful lake with mountains behind the water. It is gorgeous here on Lake Bunyoni. Amasiko Eco-Farm is just that. It also has cottages for visitors. It is also a green-school for primary students. Wilfred is a busy man. It turns out that I am in a village called Hamukaaka! [su_note note_color=”#b0b1b6″ text_color=”#030303″...
Rwanda to Uganda: From Gorillas to Potato Trucks. Feb 8 Time to leave my wonderful little village of Kinigi. It is time to get out of Rwanda. I had not ambition to leave the ‘Land of thousand hills and a million smiles,’ but I need to start making some miles and some dust. Time for the move from Rwanda to Uganda. I feel like I am going to cheat a lot of countries out of a lot of time, but...
Kinigi: Football and Rwanda Bits. Feb 7 (cont’d) I returned from my gorilla trek to Kinigi. I love Kinigi. It is my favorite village of all of my African travels. As soon as I went to the market I ran into Theo. I wanted lunch so I brought him along. The tour guides from today had earlier told me to eat in the hotel where I am staying, saying it was the only safe place in town to eat. However,...
Today was a special day where I went to spend an hour with a silverback gorilla family in the mountains of Rwanda. It was a $750 US price tag for such an experience. But what I got for that hour today was pretty freaking amazing!
Kinigi: Drunk Diaries…Reflections on a Day After Drinking Banana Beer. Feb 6 Wow, where to start… Life is a gift…. Shit, I just looked at my notes and I did not get some things completed today that I really wanted to accomplish, because I had an amazing day as a consequence. I need more of me. Or I need my helpful editor to become my personal assistant…. It sure would be nice if mom and dad were from ABBA. I...
Gisenyi to Kinigi: Dian Fossey Gorilla Facts and Child Mobs. Feb 5 [su_box title=”A Dumb-White Guy Conversation with my Motorcycle Taxi Driver” box_color=”#d2cece” title_color=”#070606″]Me – “Have you ever seen the gorillas?” Taxi guy – “What?” Me – “You looking gorillas?” Taxi guy – “Have I gorillas?” Me – “Yes.” Taxi guy – “No, gorillas in forest.” [/su_box] It is amazing how much small situations can totally alter your entire direction and where you are going in life. I do not mean,...
Gisenyi: Spinning Tires. Feb 4 [su_note note_color=”#b0b1b6″ text_color=”#030303″ radius=”1″]Well this is fantastic…. “Either you’re happy with very little, free from all of that extra luggage, because you have happiness on the inside or you don’t get anywhere! I am not advocating poverty. I am advocating sobriety. But since we have invented a consumer society, the economy must constantly grow. If it fails to increase, it’s a tragedy. We have invented a mountain of superfluous needs. Shopping for the new, discarding...
Kibuye to Gisenye: Motorcycling Rwanda. Feb 3 There was a bus that was going to leave at 07:00 to go from Kibuye to Gisenyi, but that meant a 06:00 rise. I figured I would try to find another way or hitchhike if I had to, but I did not need to get up so early for the bus. By the time I showered, packed and was ready, it was 10:00. My friend Martin from Germany was heading to a town...
Kibuye: Lightning Strikes. Feb 2 My Dutch friend Philip and I went for a walk through the bush along the side of the lake. We were in territory that I am sure not other foreigners have been. I did not know what we were going to find, but after about one kilometer of mostly busy, shrubs and prickly plants, we came out to a clearing of homes and people fishing. After we found lunch, Philip thought it was too early...
Kigali to Kibuye: Rwanda is Beautiful. Jan 31 At 09:00, hotel management knocked on the door of my room to ask for money. I paid them and crawled back into bed beside Nana. We had another tussle this morning! Ah, life is good… We fell back asleep and got up at 13:00. She went home and I hung out in the bar to wait for Leopold. Leopold was too hung over and decided that he was not going to drive...
Kigali: African Nations Championship (CHAN). Jan 30 [su_quote]Well, that sure escalated and got out of hand… I ended up getting college frat boy wasted, but it sure was fun….[/su_quote] I checked out of my guesthouse and moved to Panafrican, which is the sports bar where I was last night and made friends with Joseph, the owner. He told me they also had rooms for around $10, which is half of the price I have paid for the previous two. I...
Kigali: A Vacation from Africa in Africa. Jan 29 (cont’d) I seem to be living on peanuts… I mean the actual nuts, but I am living off of nothing as well. Peanuts are my go-to for fighting off hunger when I get too preoccupied to remember to eat and then realize I had better put something in me to alleviate the void. They roast and salt them in the skin, that you eat as well, here and they are probably the...
Kigali Genocide Memorial Center. Jan 29 Today was a dark day and it made me teary eyed. I spent the afternoon at the Kigali Memorial Center of the genocide of 1994. It was free to enter as it is a place of mourning for the locals. This is what I learned this afternoon. There will be some horrible information and graphic photos here… *All points in “quotation marks” are direct quotations taken from the memorial. Kigali Genocide Memorial Center The...
Masaka to Kigali: Hotel des Mille Collines. Jan 28 I need to get to Rwanda before I get too deep into Uganda, so I got up early and caught a bus from Masaka, Uganda to Kigali, Rwandan for $11.50. The bus that came that hour was one for a company called Jaguar. Every hour a different bus comes through town, usually for a different company. They all cost the same price. I found a place beside a Rwandan girl, who...
Walking on Eggshells Bery’s Place – The Sexual Abuse Recovery Home of 43 Ugandan Girls Sometimes one ends up in situations they could never expect. Actually, it seems to be a daily part of my existence as a man on the road trying to avoid the mainstream. Gifts of people and of life just sort of fall at my feet. Maybe that is part of being as open as possible to everything around me… My local friend and I were...
Masaka: Wonderful Ugandans Can Learn to Rock. Jan 27 I found out that when Berlin was walled in the early 1960s, the east part of the city was considered Eastern Germany of course, but the west, which I had always believed was part of West Germany, was actually something entirely different. The west part of the city was sort of a special entity that was very unique in the land with no real allegiance to either country. The citizens of...
Kalangala, Ssese Islands to Masaka: The Perks and Disadvantages of Caucasian-ing. Jan 26 Shortly after I got moving this morning, there was a knock on the door of my guestroom and one of the girls from Bery’s Place brought me a tray with coffee and cookies on it. So sweet. I finished the temporary breakfast and walked outside of the door of my guest room to find that my shoes had been washed and re-laced. By the time I returned...
Kalangala, Ssese Islands: Performing Arts Recital. Jan 25 I moved out of Dreamland and caught a motorcycle taxi to Bery’s Place in the village of Mweena. Many of his 23 daughters approached me to personally welcome me back as I took my things to the guestroom. On the front lawn, the girls had a dance instructor sitting off to the side who comes to teach them traditional dance. The girls were in the middle of practicing a routine, where they...
Kalangala, Buggala, Ssese Islands: Ugandan Wikipedia and Lake Victoria. Jan 24 Kalangala, on Buggala Island in the Ssese Islands of Uganda, is a quiet place in Lake Victoria. I assumed it would be the Ugandan counterpart to Ukerewe Island, which is also of Lake Victoria, but in the Tanzania section. Buggala Island in Uganda is far more developed and makes Ukerewe (where they slaughter albinos for witchcraft) feel very primitive. There are resorts and golf courses here in Buggala. The...
If you smock, people will think you are a jerk! Kalangala: What to not do in the Ssese Islands…Have sex… Jan 23 (cont’d) The bus pulled into Masaka where Jasmine and I disembarked and I got cash from an ATM. MONEY! However, Jasmine tried four different banks, but no ATM’s would take her Chinese bank card. We had exchanged countries and exchanged problems. Life is ridiculous! She was heavily stressed and decided to get on another bus to Kampala where...
East Africa Visa Battle: Tanzania to Uganda Jan 23 It was a crazy and stressful morning, but I really did not care that much and knew life would find a way to work itself out somehow… My friend Jasmine and I arrived at the bus terminal in Bukoba, Tanzania by 6:20 via motorcycle taxi. She had to pay for my motorcycle because I only had $0.40 worth of Tanzanian money left in my pocket. We climbed onto our Greyhound-sized bus...
Bukoba: Beachside on Lake Victoria. Jan 22 I woke up far too early, expecting to arrive between 05:00 and 06:00 in Bukoba like they had told me. Yea, we arrived at 06:40. Africa. I believe too much in what people tell me here. I read somewhere that Africans say, “Europeans have watches, but we have time.” [su_pullquote] “Europeans have watches, but we have time.”[/su_pullquote] I got off the boat with my new friends Jasmine from China and Mike from Manchester. Yesterday,...
Ukerewe Boat Mwanza Ferry Gone: Demeanors. Jan 21 So some days are strange…You start out with a bad day and then it becomes a fantastic day. When you are up, you are up and when you are down, you meet the right people to bring you up… I met Consolatha, the girl I had made plans with last night, as we were going to Ukara Island today. Consolatha showed up to meet me at a juice bar an hour late. ...
Ukerewe: Making Babies Cry and Children Terrified. Jan 20 Dear Tanzania, Thank you for pointing to Coca-Cola and explaining to me that it is soda. Thank you for pointing to the outlet in my room and explaining that is where I will get electricity. And thank you for explaining to me that the wheel in the bridge of the ship is for steering. Sincerely, The dumb white guy from a different culture than yours. I decided to catch the ferry...
Mwanza: Inspiration, Condoms, Dental Floss, and Local Yelling. Jan 19 [su_note note_color=”#b0b1b6″ text_color=”#030303″ radius=”19″]And just when I think how tough it can be in Africa as a Caucasian man battling through the touts, the would-be scammers, and the relentless drunks, I meet a young Chinese girl staying in the guesthouse who is traveling all alone and barely speaks English. Yeah, I know. And that makes me think that I kind of suck and am being a little bitch. Imagine the...
Mwanza Hooker Fight Lullabies. Jan 18 Mwanza is a very pretty town. It is gorgeous. The rocks. The colorful lizards. And no one really hassles me in the streets…. Actually, it’s not entirely true that no one hassles me in the streets. This town is nothing like Arusha or Moshi. Most people just stare at me in disbelief that there is someone in their town who is not an albino and has skin that is white. I am not even...
Arusha to Mwanza – A Sore Ass and Overlooking the Obvious. Jan 17 Swahili loves to double up on the words language-wise. Here are some examples. Almost every word I know in the language is doubled. picki-picki – Motorcycle (because it makes the sound ‘picki-picki-picki-picki’) pole-pole – Slow peeli-peeli – Spicy boda-boda – Road haraka-haraka – Hurry I was up at 04:30 so that I could shower and check in for my Arusha to Mwanza bus. I had bought a bus...
Karatu to Arusha – First World Complainers. Jan 16 [su_note note_color=”#b0b1b6″ text_color=”#030303″ radius=”1″]If you Canadians are ever wondering what happens to the clothes that do not sell in Value Village, I have found the end of the source! They seem to end up getting shipped to Tanzania. I have seen a lot of clothes in markets here with Value Village tags still attached to them. So, Canada is clearly sending those clothes. It is strange to see someone in a...
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Bangkok, Thailand – Sex Show August 3, 2008 Bangkok, Thailand -Sex Show [su_dropcap]I[/su_dropcap]t was early August and my German girlfriend and I had just left Australia on a cheap flight to squeaky…
Meeting a Silverback Gorilla Family, Rwanda February 7, 2016 Today was a special day where I went to spend an hour with a silverback gorilla family in the mountains of Rwanda. It was…
“The Bloodhound Gang are Wankers!” January 10, 2017 Anyone ever heard of a band called Electric Eel Shock? There is a reason why you haven’t. The reason why you haven’t heard of…
Tinku Festival in Bolivia – Part 2, The Fights May 4, 2014 Breakfast was at 8:30am, and I was the last to arrive. I was still feeling effects of the chicha, the local corn-moonshine we had…
Making Music in a Senior Citizen’s Center January 30, 2015 My father was hanging out with me in the basement, and then he began getting his band equipment together to haul upstairs to load…
The Recipe for a Fascinating Day March 18, 2013 Want the recipe for a fascinating day? This one serves three: Step One – Get Ingredients and Heat up the Oven It started when…
Vang Vieng Paradise of Laos Girls January 24, 2007 Vang Vieng Paradise of Laos Girls [su_dropcap]V[/su_dropcap]ang Vieng. My paradise. Vang Vieng has a lot of things to do that can occupy a man’s…